Once upon a time, there was an innocent wanderer who explored the depths and lofts of the world. This traveler was a kind soul and could not refuse a heart in true need. One day the wanderer fell into an icy crevice. The explorer was too injured from the fall to escape the frigid walls right away so the voyager decided to wait until the wounds healed and the weather mended. But the traveler grew lonely and desperate in the cold solitude. Until a little snake came along. This reptile was no ordinary creature. The serpent slipped and swirled like a river flowing of silver. The snake coiled around the wanderer’s ear and whispered “Please, it is so cold out. May I stay with you?” The traveler’s eyes flashed with recognition that this was a poisonous serpent but as soon as the idea coursed through his mind, the snake replied “If you keep me warm, I will not harm you.”
This snake was intelligent and beautiful, and the wanderer was lonely. The wanderer agreed, and they stayed together for some time. He keeping her body warm and her keeping his mind warm. Soon the traveler regained his strength and the snows began to weaken. The snake was in high spirits as well and happiness glowed through her skin. The traveler never seeing the snake so luminescent before reached out to the serpent. It was then that the snake bit him. He flinched back and cradled his bitten arm that was now swelling and oozing. “You lied to me, why did you bite me? Now I will die.” The wanderer said. The snake could only reply with “You knew what I was when you picked me up.”
I am sure many of you nerds have heard this old folktale before. Now to what the heck does this have to do with black nerdy girls? Well this post is more about girls…and boys, and people in general so yeah it totally counts.
I think there have been times in our lives where we have both been the wanderer and the snake or even both to different people. I find myself in the role of snake as of late. I know how to twist people; I know what to say to anyone to either take the heat out of a disagreement or put some glamorous fake spotlight on perceived positives. Basically I can be one master manipulator. Until recently, I didn’t even realize I was doing it. Part of it goes back to my people pleasing tendencies, see my last article “Nice Girls” for that. I don’t like people not liking me so I will do whatever it takes keep up a perfect façade.
But I think it is more than that. What drives a person to lie and deceive when they know in the long run it is going to make things worse? Along the same vein, it hurts the person you are trying to woo because you are trying to appear like a good friend, lover, or daughter but in the end you know you are just going to bite them on the ass and run away.
But what makes a “snake” personality in the first place? Are we just born that way or is it years of being the naive and lonely “wanderer” type that makes you tired of getting your butt physically and emotionally ravaged so you lash out your negative feelings on those who you are suppose to love and support.
What do you think? Do wanderers become snakes after years of abuse? Can snakes ever change? Do you think I am insane?
Floor is open.
(Sorry that this is so dark. Also sorry that this post has no real answers to any of the questions I raised. Next post will be lighter, maybe something about boobies.)